The MP Team
by Lucillia
Summary: Residents of a colony that is being victimized by Romulan pirates have decided to hire the A-Team as a last resort. Unfortunately, when acquiring said team, they grabbed the wrong vehicle.
1. Prologue: A Logically Illogical Decision

It was a small colony, isolated and on the edge of dying out. Its impending demise wasn't due to a lack of resources, the world in question would not have been colonized if that were the case. What was dooming the colony at the moment was the near impossible to meet demands of the criminal band of Sundered Ones who had found and frequently visited the colony. Giving in to the demands of the pirates who had threatened their colony in order to forestall violence had resulted in trouble, as the criminals kept returning and making even greater demands each time they did so, demands that the people who had made the place their home could no longer meet.

The leaders of the colony were meeting in secret to discuss how to deal with the situation.

"We cannot resort to violence. If we do, we become no better than they are." an elderly female named T'ari said when a middle-aged male made a particularly shocking suggestion.

"I wasn't suggesting that _we_ resort to violence." the male who was named Stron said carefully, knowing that if the Vulcan High Council got wind of what he was planning, they would, as the American colloquialism went, shit a brick.

"But how then are we to drive them off as you suggest?" T'ari asked.

"We hire an intermediary." Stron replied. "I know of a race of highly creative savages who would suit our purposes nicely."

Stron had once spent over three months on a planet called Earth when the science vessel he had been a crewmember of had crashed into the planet (1). Despite the fact that he had hated the place since it had been far too cold for his tastes, the light gravity and the higher oxygen content of the atmosphere made him constantly dizzy, and he had found the inhabitants of that planet to be highly annoying, he had kept up with any news he could get on it. He had done so in hopes of finding word of the shipmate they had left behind. He hadn't cared too much for the other male who had been overly sentimental towards the humans, but after spending so much time in close quarters with him, he had become somewhat concerned as to his fate.

The last infodump he'd received with information that had been gathered from the planet during a recent visit made by a different science vessel had contained a number of newspaper articles about a mercenary band who went around the planet helping people in situations like theirs for a usually nominal monetary fee. Fortunately, the colony had enough mineral resources to meet their usual asking price.

"Who do you suggest we hire?" a younger male named S'tavi asked.

"A band of primitive mercenaries called the A-Team." Stron replied.

&!&!&

(1) For the full story of Stron's adventure on Earth, see the Enterprise episode Carbon Creek.


	2. The Capture of the Team

Private First Class Annabel Jones and Corporal Rutherford Williams were sorely regretting riding along with Colonel Decker and Captain Crane. They had been jostled in their seats more times than they could count, flung about side to side so frequently that they were nearly seasick, and they had hit their heads on the roof of the car so many times that they were willing to swear that they had concussions as the car flew down a dirt road after the A-Team. Decker was driving this time, and even Captain Crane who had ridden with Decker a number of times was looking slightly freaked out by the ride.

The maniacal gleam in Decker's eyes and the constant muttering probably had something to do with it. Every time Jones caught sight of Decker's eyes in the rear-view mirror, she shuddered and swore that she would never ride in the same car as the insane Colonel ever again. She'd heard about the time Crane and Decker had chased the A-Team over the side of a washed out bridge, and several other insane incidents that had sounded like tall tales. At first she hadn't believed it when she'd heard the stories, but now, riding in the same car with Decker behind the wheel, she was inclined to believe.

Suddenly, ahead of them, the driver of the A-Team's van slammed on the brakes. Everyone in the car learned why a second later when there was a metallic thunk and the vehicle they were in was abruptly lifted from the ground and carried off by something.

In the van, three men, a woman, and the teenage son of the A-Team's latest client stared up at the now clear sky in amazement while a fourth man fiddled around with an electronic handheld game of some sort.

"Did I just see what I thought I saw?" Face asked.

"You mean Decker getting abducted by aliens?" Murdock asked.

"...Yes." Face replied.

"Then yes." Murdock said as he went back to playing the handheld game he had brought on the trip as if nothing of note had happened.

Several hundred miles away, Decker, Crane, Williams, and Jones were being herded out of the car and onto a ship which promptly took off the moment they were all aboard. The instant the ship left the atmosphere, what seemed to be the captain of the vessel turned to the three men and one woman who were being restrained by the crew.

"Colonel, I apologize for the alarming and abrupt manner in which you were acquired, but my people's government would not approve of my hiring of your team, and therefore it had to be done as swiftly and surreptitiously as possible." the captain said.

"Hiring?" Colonel Decker asked in surprise, before rapidly covering up his shock. "Just who do you think you've 'hired'."

"The A-Team of course." the captain of the alien vessel replied.

"What makes you think we're the A-Team?" Crane asked.

"You match the description that was given." the alien captain replied. "The team consists of four members, the leader who is a male of pale complexion with pale hair and blue eyes who answers to his former military rank of Colonel, the other three members are another pale complected male with sand colored hair and blue eyes, a dark complected male with black hair and eyes, and the female who chronicles their missions."

"Yes, and if you studied the A-Team as closely as you have said, you'll also know that they travel around in a van and don't wear uniforms." Decker replied.

"We scanned the "van" as you call it, and there were too many life forms inside to correspond with the description given. We have also been informed that the A-Team are considered by your species to be masters of disguise with a propensity for passing themselves off as legitimate members of their native land's military." the captain replied.

"Despite how beings who are not native to your planet are depicted in popular culture, we have no intention of harming you, and you will be rewarded on successful completion of your mission prior to your return." the captain finished.

"And," Colonel Decker said. "What exactly does our "mission" entail?"

"We have recently been having some difficulties with a band of pirates who have been making demands we cannot meet, and as we are members of a non-violent race, we cannot deal with the issue in the manner in which it needs to be dealt. We were loath to consider the option that we have decided upon, as committing violence by proxy is still committing violence in a way. But, aside from forfeiting our investment of time and resources and returning to our homeworld, it seems to be the most logical solution available. We have chosen you because it is likely that any other mercenaries we may hire would turn on us after services have been rendered. Your team however has gained a reputation for honest dealings with your clients." the captain replied.

"And if we refuse?" Captain Crane asked.

"Since another science vessel is due to enter the system in under an hour, and a number of questions that we do not have appropriate answers to would be asked if we were still in-system when it arrived, it may be a while before we can return you to your home. Unfortunately, either way, you will be coming with us, and you will likely still be with us when the pirates return to pillage our colony when we fail to meet their demands." the captain replied.

"Congratulations." Decker said. "You've just hired the A-Team."

"Colonel..." Crane said.

"They want the A-Team." Decker muttered to the Captain. "They were desperate to get the A-Team. And, as long as they have the A-Team, they'll be happy, and we may actually survive this."


End file.
